Principal

Childhood and adolescence are critical periods for physical, social, cognitive and emotional development and thus building strong mental health during this time is crucial to ensure well-being throughout life. Studies suggest that there are protective factors that help guard against poor mental health outcomes, including providing children and young people with an enriching environment, positive experiences, and supportive relationships both at home and at school. This plays a significant role in shaping their well-being.

Schools and parents today are focusing increasingly on helping children and young people understand that caring for their emotional wellbeing is just as important as looking after their physical health.  A major role of parenting is to assist children manage their emotions and support them through challenging times. Whether they’re facing friendship issues, school-related stress, anxiety, or major life changes, our role is to help them build emotional awareness and develop coping skills to manage life’s ups and downs and to foster their resilience and ability to bounce back.  It is essential to teach them that emotions are constantly changing and that we won’t always feel happy, and that’s perfectly normal. Feeling sad, angry, frustrated and anxious at times is a part of being human and all emotions are valid.

These are the messages we continue to reinforce through our school’s wellbeing program, as we help students build self-awareness, emotional resilience and a sense of belonging.

Some Useful Strategies to Help Your Child Overcome Challenges Include:

Encouraging open communication and practising active listening

Finding a quiet moment to begin a conversation such as when you are walking the dog or driving home from school can make it easier for children and young people to open up.  Simply being present and available, listening and offering a hug can be enough.  You don’t always need to know the perfect response.  It is about creating a calm and safe space that is non-judgemental and non-lecturing, where children can feel they can share how they feel and be heard.  Reassuring them “I am here for you if you want to chat” or “You can tell me anything without getting into trouble” is enough to help build trust.

Try to summarise what they have said and respond with curiosity rather than judgement or minimising their feelings.  For example, if your child says they were excluded or left out at lunchtime, instead of saying “Don’t worry about it, you will be fine”, you may want to say, “That sounds tough, that must have been hurtful for you”and explore how they feel.

Be emotionally available and validating

Being a validating parent is accepting how you child is feeling in that moment, without an expectation or comment of what they should be feeling instead.  Letting them know that you understand their feelings and that you hear them.  “It’s OK to be feeling upset at the moment, I am here for you”.  Teaching them to sit with uncomfortable feelings, and not always trying to fix it for them, or come up with a solution.  Once they are feeling better you can jointly try to problem solve and come up with a solution.

Help your child identify and talk about their feelings

Help your child identify and express what they are feeling by helping them put their feelings into words.  Encourage them to make sense of what they are experiencing and to recognise that their emotions are normal and more importantly, accepted by you.  This shows children it’s OK to express emotions and manage them.  You might say something like – “It sounds like you are feeling confused right now” or “I can understand why you are feeling like this”

Teach Coping Skills

When children feel overwhelmed and emotional, it is difficult for them to think clearly, communicate and problem solve.  Helping them learn how to calm themselves is important in gaining control over big emotions.  If they are feeling particularly upset or overwhelmed, encourage them use some simple tools to manage strong emotions.

• Deep breathing: breathing helps us regulate particularly if we are upset, it anchors our feelings and assists with keeping us calm
  Try strong, slow, deep breaths in through the nose and slow breaths out through the mouth to help calm their body and mind
• Grounding: focusing on naming 5 things you see, 4 you can touch, 3 you hear, 2 you smell, 1 you taste and then bringing the attention back to the present
• Movement: Exercise, dancing, or walking can release emotional energy

These strategies help children feel in control and teachers them that intense emotions can be managed.

Encourage routines

Encouraging healthy routines that promote a healthy lifestyle including diet, exercise and good quality sleep, play an important role in children’s mental well-being and building resilience. A predictable routine helps children feel secure and reduces anxiety and overwhelm. Similarly encourage quiet times for your children e.g. reading, drawing, walks with the family, family movie night, this can help them recharge. 

Challenge unhelpful thoughts

Our thoughts directly impact our feelings and behaviours, creating a cycle where negative thoughts lead to negative emotions and actions. Help teach children to challenge unhelpful thoughts, help them recognize, question, and reframe these thoughts into more balanced and helpful ones.  When your child shares distressing thoughts, help them separate thoughts from facts and teach them that not everything they think is true or is factual.

Know when to get professional help

Whilst having supportive conversations and using coping strategies may help children with life’s challenges, there may be times when professional help is required. Seeking professional help is the key to obtaining the right support and to avoid children and young people suffering in silence.  If you notice persistent changes to your child’s mood, behavior, sleep or eating, if they are withdrawn or not doing the activities that they normally will do, it is important that you seek professional help.  If something does not feel right or your child’s behaviour has changed drastically, it is always wise to seek professional help.

By nurturing and developing children and adolescents’ emotional health and well-being we give them the tools to face life’s challenges and the message that seeking help is important to good mental health.

If you have any concerns about your child, please reach out to either your classroom teacher or Head of Junior School if your child is in Junior School or your child’s YLC or school counsellors, if in Senior School.

Secondary School Year Level Coordinators

Ms Kaitlin Barr – Year 7 – barrk@cggs.vic.edu.au

Mr Benjamin McManamny – Year 8 – mcmanamnyb@cggs.vic.edu.au

Mr Daniel Loff – Year 9 – loffd@cggs.vic.edu.au

Mrs Karen Anderson – Year 10 – andersonk@cggs.vic.edu.au

Mrs Nicole McKie – Year 11 – mckien@cggs.vic.edu.au

Mrs Nareen Robinson – Year 12 – robinsonn@cggs.vic.edu.au

School Counsellors

Beth Sarlos – sarlosb@cggs.vic.edu.au

Paula Kolivas – pkolivas@cggs.vic.edu.au

Beth Sarlos
School Counsellor

References:

Butler, Quigg, Bates et al: The Contributing role of family, school and peer supportive relationships in protecting the mental wellbeing of Children and Adolescents, School Mental Health, 2022